Things looking up

For the most part. I'm on good note/terms with my friend. As he understands the reasoning behind everything... FINALLY RIGHT as he had no other way but to understand. As if he didn't....guess what I could care less.

Moving along, its been a bit of bumps on my road. However, I am making it. More positive in the light that's its about ME. Getting back on track, making a gain plan, etc. I'm just chilling, buying my time with everything. I am comfortable in my new place as I been in that area before. Which is a good thing....my neighbor though has been fighting and arguing none stop. Ghetto to say the least. I mean shorty she does not want you. I just don't get it..but I guess its not for me to get. That's the ONLY downfall is the thin walls. UGGGHH

I hope and pray that I will be able to purchase a house again one day SOON that's affordable amongst other things. I will be calling my mortgage company in the morning to go ahead with the Deed in Lieu foreclosure where it shall erase all debt.. I guess it will look a bit 'better' on my shot credit and make it able for me to become an homeowner again sooner than later. So we shall see how that goes.. I hope I do not stress out with that. I faxed over the authorization form from my lawyers so that they can speak with me directly. They better have received it by the time I make that call. Just saying.

Christmas is basically here and I am excited. New Years is right around the corner and I am looking for a prosperous 2012. I hope it brings peace, joy, relief, good health as I need it all. plus some. I tell you if its not one thing its another. People are struggling from all types of walk of life. And that's sad. The economy sucks along with the government. Being real here guys. A lot need jobs, finances, assistance but cant get anything. BUT if they where not looking, users, etc they would be able to get assistance with the drop of a dime. So not right.

What else..... umm that's really about it. So until next time....

Life is hard as is

so why is it that when your in a bad relationship (even with good points here and there), that the breakup is HARD...even when it happened the wrong way or not in a way that you anticipated.

Well that is what went down with me tonight/before midnight. Yes do care, love the person. However, I love myself and my health much more and realized that I have to help and take care of myself. It's one thing to debate and argue. BUT when a person continues to throw things in your face when you gave valid discussions on how you feel and not even blame them while in your own rant...why would they do such a thing? And why would I or anyone else put up with that over and over again. So yes I have hit my breaking point. And ended it. At least he states that he still love and appreciate everything I have done for him (my evil side is like he better) my good side is like 'okay so we are not on a hate hate can't communicate level. Wheeeeew.

I pray that he and I both get our own personal lives together for the sake of SELF. As far as relationships goes. Mane I give that to the Lord. As I feel that I'm not made for them. As they have all, umm about 80% bad. It might just be ME. Ohh well.

NOW I have to focus on myself and my lil stinka fat butt and getting my life back on track, my finances, and hopefully with the grace of the Lord become an homeowner again in life. Loosing everything I have worked for is enough in one life time. But for other simple mess to continue to happen that could have also been avoided, well hey that's why I am STRESSED THE HELL OUT. I am in constant prayer and will be again after I complete this post.

For those going through something or think that your the only one or that no one has it worse off than you... WELL its not just you!!! And your NOT alone!!

Other than that, I need to find a starting point. That's my next step. So stay tuned as this new chapter of my life is just beginning.